Pick a theme to guide your year and your goals

I am a goal-minded girl.  I love sitting down at the end of every year, with my pad and pen in hand, plotting and planning all the things I want to accomplish in the upcoming days, weeks, year. But, several years ago, I realized that while specific planning did help me reach some of my goals, at times, my naroow, single-minded focus also kept me from accomplishing some of them. I often became so focused on the hows and whys of one path, that I limited myself from others that could have taken me further.

So, I started doing things differently. Instead of one tightly focused goal I started picking an annual theme; and I began to focus more on the what then the how of the things that I did want to accomplish within that theme. I still set some specific goals and kept them firmly in mind, but these days I’m more open and adaptive to things that emerge along the way. This helped me accomplish not only the few goals on my list, but to create a lifestyle that supported the most important things overall.

This year, my annual theme is LOVE. I’ve also had the year of “YES” and “FLOW.”

This year, I’m going to focus on giving and receiving love – unconditionally. I’m going to accept compliments, let people do what they need to do without my judgment or control. I’m going to be kind, even when I don’t feel like it, and respond with compassion because deep down I know when people are hurting me it’s because they are hurting. I’m going to surround myself with the work and people and foods and vistas and things that I Iove. I’m going to root on my friends as they pursue their goals. And, I’m going to be kinder, softer, easier on myself. I’m going to do the things that I know I love and try new things to learn about potential new loves or passions.

This focus on LOVE will root me to the things that matter most to me. My year of flow reminded me to let up and let loose to become aware of all that was coming into my life. In a very literal way I practiced “going with the flow” of it all instead of living with the illusion that I was in control. The year of Love will ground me in the higher energies and remind me to tap into them to contribute to others but also stay close to my own values and purpose.

Then, when I draft a goal that includes making more money, getting physically fit or writing another book, my focus on Love immediately pulls me back to the reasons why I want to achieve those goals. Becoming healthier and more fit is a way of loving myself. When I think about growing my business and making more money, I realize I want to do that by taking only work that I love, work that inspires me. That will help me make better business decisions.

When you hold too tight to a goal or become too narrowly focused, you actually limit other positive things that could come your way.  Say you want to lose 50 pounds and you become wound up in that goal.  You may choose to lose 50 pounds on some unhealthy fad diet and while the weight may drop off, there’s likely to be an unwelcome side effect, such as you get ill because your body isn’t properly nourished, or you feel deprived and anxious, or you quickly put the weight back on after you’re done dieting. However, if you pick a theme for your year – like Love, or health, or fun, or patience – the route to your goal sets up a little differently. Then, as in my case, getting fit is a “loving” goal that presumes health and weight loss and the other things that will evolve out of that fitness.

If you choose a theme such as patience – then how you pursue your goal to lose weight or get a new job or stop smoking will be informed by that.

This approach has allowed me to stop micromanaging every step along the way. When I set the goal to publish a book – during my year of flow – I took inspired action every day toward that goal. These were conscious, orchestrated steps. But, they weren’t necessarily what I thought I’d be doing from the outset. Things came up that I could never have planned for.  My inspired actions were a result of the things I knew and the things I learned. When my life shifted and changed and new things entered, I adapted my inspired actions, learned what I needed to know, and followed the momentum. My book will be released this fall.

Going with an annual theme feels expansive and freeing. It’s fun and I’ve found it makes it a lot easier to make decisions and persevere even when challenges come my way that in the past may have threatened my goal. On Monday I’ll tell you how I set up my theme to support my annual goals. For now, think about what your theme is for 2012. It will make it easier to accomplish all that you most desire.

Tidbit: Part of living with LOVE for me, means to mind my own business and to stop micro-managing others, such as my sweet husband Mr. J. Loving him, means allowing him to be who he is — even when it bugs me. It’s something I’m already working on and thought more about after speaking with author and relationship Guru Arielle Ford this fall. She shared her expertise for my book Imperfect Spirituality and what she said was both wise and practical. That’s why I think it’s worth checking out her new book Wabi Sabi Love: The Ancient Art of Finding Perfect Love in Imperfect Relationships.

In her book Ford shows you how to move from “annoyed to enjoyed” in your relationship so that you can fall in love all over again. Order today and Ford’s book also comes with some great free bonus gifts.

Check it out here: http://thewabisabibook.com/